It’s been a little while (okay, more than a little while, whoops) since I’ve sat down and written for you, and I suppose my delay strikes for a variety of reasons. Truthfully, I don’t feel as propelled to share my life stories and pangs of random emotion as I used to, and I’m okay with it. I cherish this life that God has given me, while acknowledging that I am only one star in this galaxy. The light that I exude isn’t the only light there is; all of the other stars matter, too. Without my light, the galaxy wouldn’t shine quite as brightly, but the only reason it shines the way it does is because of all of the other people who let their lights shimmer freely in the atmosphere.
The past few months have been beautiful and bittersweet. They’ve beaten me to a pulp at times, humbled me when my head was growing larger than my heart, and forced me out of my comfort zone to grow exponentially. Here are some lessons I’ve learned, or continued (or begun) learning so far this summer.
- Stop wasting your time caring about arbitrary or insignificant things (insofar as you can control it), because every second is far too valuable to throw away. You could spend your entire life thinking about what other people think of you, to name one example, or you could spend your time being a loving or hardworking or in some way positive individual.
- Be honest with yourself. If you think you need to change something in your life, don’t make excuses. Change it. Take credit for your accomplishments and take the blame when you make mistakes.
- Your mind is RESILIENT, if you believe that you can be. And if you don’t have a strong will already, it is more than possible to build one.
- Everything will be okay, always. Sometimes things feel completely out of whack (and sometimes they really are) and it seems like there’s absolutely no hope at all, but there always is, somewhere.
- Instant gratification isn’t a “thing,” but patience is. And since the world doesn’t revolve around you, you’re obligated by default to wait. Whether or not you do so patiently is up to you.
- Don’t feel sorry for yourself, ever. You could channel the exact same feelings into growing yourself and facing the things that bother you or annoy you or drive you up a wall or make you cry. Being sorry for yourself is unproductive. Don’t be unproductive (p.s. relaxation is productive for your mind and body so make sure you relax, too).
- Don’t be afraid of offending people by being who you are. That doesn’t mean that you should go out of your way to purposely push people’s buttons simply because you know they feel differently than you do, but always speak your mind when it’s appropriate and share your ideas. If you hurt someone’s feelings, they’ll get over it. And if they don’t, it’s not on you.
- You can’t live your life just so that people like you. God created every individual extremely differently, and you cannot possibly engineer your every action to satisfy the entire human race. It just won’t happen. People are different, and what one person loves, another person hates. If people don’t like you, you’re not obligated to change (but refer to #2 instead). Not everyone will like you. It’s better to accept this sooner rather than later.
- Not all friends last forever. There are plenty of people who are meant to enter your life for a certain period of time, and then go. There are also plenty of people who will hurt your feelings, change their minds, and cause drama. Understand that everyone is human and these things happen, but also understand that you are only one person and one friend. You cannot bear the weight of the world on your shoulders alone, and you are not obligated to associate with people who seriously affect your well-being in negative ways.
- Stick by the people who are your true friends. Some people are blessed with others who become family, unrelated by blood but completely related by love. Don’t let those people go. Stand by them, stick with them, and thank God that He gave them to you because you are very, VERY blessed.
- Smile. Even if you are miserable, you still have reasons to smile. This may mean putting your feelings on the back burner for a little while and just trying your best to love the moment you are in. And there will be times when loving your life is impossible, no matter how hard you try. That’s when you think about #5 and understand that time heals all wounds, and you’ll get there. “Just keep swimming.”
You’ve probably heard all of these things before, like I have, but these lessons most likely aren’t things that we’ll just learn overnight and move on from. No. We can’t live on autopilot. We have to remember the things that matter, the people that matter, the ideas that matter, and so on and so forth.
This isn’t about me anymore. This is about you. If I feel inspired at all from this point on to continue writing, I can promise you that this blog is not for me. This is our story, pieces of the human experience. Here’s my piece to the puzzle. Where is yours?